Life has a funny way of changing when you least expect it, and that’s exactly what happened to Russian-born Ksenia. One moment she was working in Moskow; the next, she was meeting her future husband on the dance floor on a solo trip to Prague.
Their dance-floor romance moved from Prague to Switzerland, and eleven years later, the couple has two children and call the canton of Aargau home. But life hasn’t been all dance-parties for Ksenia. She has had to reinvent her career, learn a new culture and find her people.
Name: Ksenia Kayser
Country of Birth: Russia
Years in Switzerland? 11 years
Married Swiss? 11 years
2 Duvets or 1? 2
How did you meet your Swiss partner?
In a disco club during my vacation in Prague
How did you decide (or not) to call Switzerland home? Was that before or after getting together?
From my first trip here in 2008 to visit my future husband, I felt right at home in Switzerland. Of course, there are still things that I quite don’t understand about Switzerland or its people, but I accept it as a part of this country.
How do you deal with two languages at home? How do you encourage the “minority” language?
Before I moved to Switzerland, we used to speak only English. But after moving & learning German, it’s mostly 50/50 at home. I still, though, on my bad mood days, prefer English. With my kids, though, I speak only Russian.
Photographs: Left – Ramon Wenger. Right @irinamilordova
What have been some challenges?
- Getting used to sooo much tasty bread!!!
- Finding a job, of course. My education & working experience were not really acknowledged here, so I had to take a job in Germany before I could get one in Switzerland. In the meantime, I furthered my education & am now self-employed.
- Finding MY people.
What is your favourite thing about being married Swiss?
Advantage of waking up every single day & find myself in the middle of Punctuality!
Your family’s favourite meal:
At the moment, our family enjoys eating Gerstensuppe (Barley Soup) & Pelmeni (Russian dumplings).
What’s something from your home culture that you’ve introduced into your multicultural relationship?
The first thing that comes to mind is 8th March – International Women’ Day, one of the biggest holidays in Russia. I am definitely more relaxed about it now, but I make sure flowers are present for all the women in our family on the day. Also, Russian cuisine (except caviar), of course, that, lucky me, is loved by all of my family members.
(In non-pandemic times) Do you get to go back “home” often?
Every second year.
What is the first thing you grab/eat when you arrive back to Russia? And what is the first thing you grab/eat when you return to Switzerland?
When returning home to Russia, the first thing I eat is Borsch & Balish ( a traditional Tatar dish). And when returning to Switzerland – definitely a St. Galler Brot!
Photographs provided by Ksenia
Has being married Swiss-made integrating easier?
It’s definitely easier to integrate into a “real “Swiss life, especially in terms of language & understanding of their mentality.
Marriage is about compromise, especially when blending two cultures. Can you think of a good story of having both compromises because of your two different cultures?
He accepts that my Russian mentality doesn’t accept things like “RACLETTE & FONDUE ARE TO BE MADE ONLY IN WINTER”. I make it when I want it! And me, in my turn, trying to learn buying seasonal fruits & veggies, for example, 😉.
He now accepts that museums & cultural events are also an option while planning our free time & I get that summer vacation in the mountains might be not such a bad idea.
Any humous misunderstandings?
Plenty but I can’t think of any specific at the moment….
How do you deal with the question of Samichlaus/Santa Claus /Christkindli/Christmas or other cross-cultural traditions applicable to your relationship?
We take it easy, helped by Orthodox Christmas, both date & celebration, are different from the catholic here. For example, Christmas in Russia is celebrated on 6th January & is in no way connected to Santa Claus bringing presents to kids. It is a religious celebration where people would go to Church. Ded Moroz & Snegurochka (his granddaughter) are coming over with gifts on the night of 31st December. So we just do both. As our kids grow up here, we leave the religious explanation up to the school. Any celebration related to religion is also often supported by stories from Grossmami & Grosspapi.
Is Switzerland now home?
Yes
About Ksenia
I was born in the Tatarstan Republic (part of RF), got my master degree in Linguistics & worked for five years in an absolutely different branch in Moscow. Then, a vacation to Prague on my own & ended up meeting my future husband in a disco club. I am happy to be a mom of two kids, have a kind, caring (& super handsome) husband, have my solid friends circle (which I cherish a lot!). And I am finally getting my dream degree in Fashion Styling. Follow Ksenia over on Instagram and find more about her work over on her website.
Photographer: @irinamilordova
